Saturday, March 25, 2017

I like this one

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Monday, March 20, 2017

GOD ACCURACY

When GOD solves our problems, we have faith in HIS abilities. When GOD doesn't solve our problems, HE has faith in our abilities. One may observe God's accuracy in the hatching of eggs. . . those of the canary in 14 days; those of the barnyard hen in 21 days; eggs of ducks and geese in 28 days; those of the mallard in 35 days; the eggs of the parrot and the ostrich hatch in 42 days.

(Notice, they are all divisible by seven, the number of days in a week!)

See God's wisdom in the making of an elephant. . . .The four legs of this great beast all bend forward in the same direction. No other quadruped is so made. God planned that this animal would have a huge body - too large to live on two legs. For this reason He gave
it four fulcrums so that it can rise from the ground easily. The horse rises from the ground on its two front legs first. A cow rises from the ground with its two hind legs first. How wise the Lord is in all His works of creation! Each watermelon has an even number of stripes on the rind. Each orange has an even number of segments. Each ear of corn has an even number of rows.
Each stalk of wheat has an even number of grains. Every bunch of bananas has on its lowest row an even number of bananas, and each row decreases by one, so that one row has an even number and the next row an odd number.

Amazing! There's more...The waves of the sea roll in on shore twenty-six to the minute in all kinds of weather.All grains are found in even numbers on the stalks.
God has caused the flowers to blossom at certain specified times during the day. Linnaeus, the great botanist, once said that if he had a conservatory containing the right kind of soil, moisture, aature, he could tell the time of day or night by the flowers that were open and those that were closed.
The lives of each of us may be ordered by the Lord in a beautiful way for His glory, if we will only entrust Him with our lives. If we try to regulate our own lives, we will have only mess and failure.
Only God, who made our brains and hearts, can successfully guide them to a profitable end.
When you carry the Bible, Satan has a headache; when you open it, he collapses.
When he sees you reading it, he loses his strength, and when you stand on the Word of God, Satan can't hurt you! And did you also know...
...that when you are about to forward this email to others, the devil will probably try to discourage you, but do it anyway.
Life without God is like an unsharpened pencil - it has no point.
I pray God bless you in ways you never even dreamed.

Sunday, March 19, 2017

Ramblings of a retired mind
I think like this sometimes---when I do think. Do you?

I found this timely, because today I was in a store that sells sunglasses, and only sunglasses. A young lady walks over to me and asks, "What brings you in today?"

I looked at her, and said, "I'm interested in buying a refrigerator.” She didn't quite choose to respond.

Am I getting to be that age?

I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. I can't afford one. So I'm wearing my garage door opener.

I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.

When people see a cat's litter box they always say, “Oh, have you got a cat?” Just say: “No, it's for company!”

Employment application blanks always ask who is to be called in case of an emergency. I think you should write, ‘An ambulance.'

The older you get the tougher it is to lose weight because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement..

Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL..

Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

Some people try to turn back their "odometers." Not me. I want people to know 'why' I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.

You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

Ah! Being young is beautiful but being old is comfortable.

May you always have Love to Share, Cash to Spare, And Friends who Care

Monday, March 13, 2017

Update
Haven't been on for a while. Had some health issues, got home from the hospital the same day our son and his wife arrived for a short visit. They live in Fl. He was hoping we might have a little snow so his wife could see what it was like, so there was enough, he was able to make a couple of snow balls.

Doctors and all the testing they did, doctor's finally figured my double vision was from a slight stroke in my right eye. After a couple of weeks it has gotten better. So no more eye patch. I still haven't tried to drive, still have double vision when I turn my eyes to far too the left. My blood pressure and sugar are both under control, they said this just happen with the two problems I have, PLUS old age. So there you go. I am 80, take medicine for both high blood pressure and sugar.

I had a physical therapist for a few weeks, showing me exercises to do to make my legs stronger. From not doing much, the legs tend to get weak. Well I have some clothes I need to wash and dry. Then it will be time to think of something for supper. I don't get that hungry and nothing sounds good, I do have some canned Navy beans, Abe loves them, will add a little ham for seasoning and serve them to him over butter bread. He loves it that way. Myself I'll probably have a peanut better and jelly sandwich with a glass of milk.

Everyone have a great evening. It's pretty chilly here today, damp, cold and chilly, I'll be so happy when Spring arrives

Some I'm sure you have seen before, but they are still funny.
Double click to make the page a little larger.

Thursday, February 02, 2017

A Few Laughs

I just read that 4,153,237 people got married last year, not to cause any trouble but shouldn't that be an even number?

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.

I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.

When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90 % of their body... men are so polite they only look at the covered parts.

A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight, live longer than the men who mention it.

Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?

America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won't cross the street to vote.

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That's your common sense leaving your body.

Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?

My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that.

I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.

Strong people don't put others down. They lift them up and slam them on the ground for maximum damage.

I hate when I am about to hug someone really sexy and my face hits the mirror.

Money talks… but all mine ever says is good-bye.

You're not fat, you're just easier to see.

If you think nobody cares whether you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.