1 Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written
an impressive new book. It's called .
'Ministers Do More Than Lay People.'
2 Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink
and be Mary.
3. The difference between the Pope and
your boss; the Pope only expects you
to kiss his ring.
4 My mind works like lightning. One brilliant
flash and it is gone.
5 The only time the world beats a path to
your door is if you're in the bathroom.
6 I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once.
The seat folded up, the drink spilled and
that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.
7 It used to be only death and taxes
were inevitable. Now, of course, there's
shipping and handling, too.
8 A husband is someone who, after taking
the trash out, gives the impression that
he just cleaned the whole house.
9 My next house will have no kitchen - just
vending machines and a large trash can.
10. A blonde said, 'I was worried that my
mechanic might try to rip me off.
I was relieved when he told me all
I needed was turn signal fluid.'
11. Definition of a teenager?
God's punishment...for enjoying sex.
12. As you slide down the banister of life, may
the splinters never point the wrong way.