Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Try to remember where you've been!

Floyd's Funeral


Floyd works hard at the plant and spends two nights each week bowling and plays golf every Saturday.

His wife thinks he's pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.

The doorman at the club greets them and says, 'Hey, Floyd! How ya doin?'

His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.

'Oh no,' says Floyd. 'He's in my bowling league.

When they are seated, a waitress asks Floyd if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser.

His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says 'How did she know that you drink Budweiser?'

'I recognize her, she's the waitress from the golfclub. I always have a Bud at the end of the 1st nine, honey.'

A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Floyd, starts to rub herself all over him and says,

'Hi Floyd. Want your usual table dance, big boy?'

Floyd's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.

Floyd follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her.

Floyd tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it .

She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every 4 letter word in the book.

The cabby turns around and says, 'Geez Floyd, you picked up a real bitch this time.'

Floyd's funeral will be on Friday.




13 comments:

Abraham Lincoln said...

"picked up a real bitch this time."

That is the straw that would break the camel's back.

fishing guy said...

That was a funny one for sure.

Diane said...

Funny, funny...what a way to start the day!

Hugs,
Diane

Pat - An Arkansas Stamper said...

Thanks for the funny ha-ha today, Mrs. L. :)

The 4th Sister said...

This was a good one!

Gramma Ann said...

Funny one;))

Mental P Mama said...

I think I knew that guy;)

raccoonlover1963 said...

I think it should have been a double funeral, Floyd and the cabbie!
Lisa

China Pattern said...

LOL, I loved your story! I think your last blog was interesting, too. I am older than McDonald's, Disney Land and your marriage. Ha! I was born in January of 1955. I use my blog to talk about everything and I am usually telling the truth. LOL.

Paz said...

LOL!

Paz

Renie Burghardt said...

Hahaha, I guess Floyd won't be going golfing or bowling anymore! Hahaha.

Good night, Patty.

Renie

The Mulligan Family said...

Oh My! That's really funny. thanks for the hearty laugh. Glad you stopped back by our site. Thank you for the Congrats! We're really happy... and to be a Great Grandma before I'm 50!!! That's a pretty cool accomplishment, I would say. Cheers!

Wanda said...

What a twist as the end of that funny one!!! Will the stripper attend the funeral???

Patty ~~ on a serious note, J. has had a set back, and throwing up again. Has an appointment Friday with the specialists~~ Please keep praying....she is so tired of being sick.
Love and Hugs
Wanda