Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Jellyfish and Divers

Have you had a bad day at work lately?

If you don't laugh out loud after you read this you are in a coma! This is even funnier when you realize it's real! Next time you have a bad day at work think of this guy.

Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana ..

He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 FM in Ft. Wayne, Indiana , who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.

Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all ..

Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.

As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool.

So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature.

It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints.

What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. With in a few seconds my butt started to burn .. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened.

The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate

When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt.

I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.

Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.

When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber.

The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

Now repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.'

Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?

May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!!

Pass this on to all your friends, just incase they're having a bad day!!!



Abe said...

Gosh that is funny. I can imagine the picture of him coming back on board wearing his nature suit and helmet.

Reader Wil said...

Well it's good you warned us!! Fancy a jellyfish in your wetsuit. I knew a girl who had one in her swimsuit. Have a nice day!

mommanator said...

very funny. you wont catch me complaing about work

Gramma Ann said...

I don't think I ever had that bad of a day! And I hope I never do. My goodness but that was funny. You started my day off with a laugh...

Margaret Cloud said...

Patty that is the funniest thing I have heard lately. Aside from being so funny it must of hurt like a son -of-a-gun and not being able to poop for a few days, ouch. Made my laugh for the day, hope your week is going great. Thanks for coming by.

Melinda said...

yep that is pretty good mom!

Priyanka Khot said...


This actually worked... I am laughing hysterically.

Winifred said...

Oh that's hard to beat as a bad day anywhere. As Abe says the image of him with just his helmet is really funny. There's no mention of what he said to those men laughing at him. I bet the air was blue!

Shionge said...

Yes..I LOVE my job :D

Renie Burghardt said...

Oi, Veh! The poor guy! LOL LOL LOL

Have a good night, Patty.


Femin Susan said...

pity that a jelly fish bit you. It's good that you warned us. I will always think of your lesson(with the jelly fish.)

Brenda said...

Yikes! That was NOT a good day, but then again it provided laughter for some of us. What a trade off...

Nancy said...

Oh, that must have been painful! That poor guy! Guess we should all just be glad we have jobs, period! Yes, I LOVE my jobs! LOL

((( HUGS )))