Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Adult material

Bitches 'til the End!

Man, I'll tell ya, women can be cold until the end!

The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, 'I've got some bad news. You have cancer, and you'd best put your affairs in order.' The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and walk into the waiting room where her daughter had been waiting. 'Well, daughter, we women celebrate when things are good, and we celebrate when things don't go so well. In this case, things aren't well. I have cancer. So, let's head to the club and have a martini.'

After 3 or 4 martinis, the two were feeling a little less somber. There were some laughs and more martinis. They were eventually approached by some of the woman's old friends, who were curious as to what the two were celebrating. The woman told her friends they were drinking to her impending end, 'I've been diagnosed with AIDS.' The friends were aghast, gave the woman their condolences and beat a hasty retreat.

After the friends left, the woman's daughter leaned over and whispered, 'Momma, I thought you said you were dying of cancer, and you just told your friends you were dying of AIDS! Why did you do that??'

'Because I don't want any of those bitches sleeping with your father after I'm gone.'

And THAT, my friends, is what is called, 'Putting Your Affairs In Order.'

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY...
Women are like phones:
They like to be held, talked to, and touched often..
But push the wrong button and your ass is disconnected.

10 comments:

Hobo ........ ........ ........ said...

Yet to connect to get disconnected.

madcobug said...

Cute post. Helen

Lady Di Tn said...

LOL Since Prince is the telecommunication man at St. Thomas Hospital I must send him the quote for the day. Peace

jinksy said...

Well, you push all the right buttons! lol :)

Granny on the Web said...

I would like to think I had the nerve...

Love Granny

Mental P Mama said...

Priceless!

Denise said...

Always fun to come here and see what your post of the day is Patty.

Cheryl said...

Woo hoo. Thanks for the laugh!

claude said...

Yes, always fun, Patty.
I wish you and Abe a Happy New Year and above all a very good health.

Twisted Fencepost said...

That would do the job. tee hee
I don't think I would have thought that far ahead.