Saturday, December 19, 2009

Received from a blogging friend

You be the judge
More than 25 million boxes of crackers are sold in the UK each Christmas, each box containing a joke.

The following are some of the favorite grin/groans according to a poll of 4000 Brits.

You be the judge!

Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?
He wanted to win the no-bell prize

What goes oh, oh, oh?
Santa walking backwards

What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.

What did Adam yell on the day before Christmas?
'It's Christmas, Eve!'

What do you call a penguin in the Sahara Desert ?
Lost

What do you call a man with brown paper trousers?
Russell (Not sure what this one means, must mean something in GB.)

How did the human cannonball lose his job?
He got fired

Why don't ducks tell jokes when they're flying?
Because they would quack up

What do you call the fear of getting stuck while sliding down a chimney?
Santa Claus-trophbia

What happened to the turkey at Christmas?
It got gobbled

What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations?
Tinsilitis

What's the fastest thing in the water?
A motor pike

Why did the skeleton go alone to the New Year's Eve party?
He had no body to go with

What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees?
Horn-aments
Go here to see BETH'S BLOG

4 comments:

Vickie's Michigan Garden (my backyard) said...

Patti,
Good to smile this morning they were all so funny-
The best one for me is the scientist and the no bell prize.

The paper bag one is good too it means he russells (makes noise) when he walks.

vickie

Beth Niquette said...

Heehee--I'm SO glad you liked those funnies! ((hugs)) I'd never heard them before. (grin)

There's a good sized rainstorm sweeping in this evening. But for Oregon--well, that's pretty much the norm. I truly do envy you your snows!

Thanks again for your encouraging comments. You are just a dear.

Please greet Abe for me, too. And Merry Christmas!!!

Renie Burghardt said...

Pretty funny ones! They did make me grin and groan! Which is a good thing for a day when I just got out of a stay in the hospital. But I am fine and looking forward to Christmas.

Renie

Cheryl said...

Haha! I think Russell would be for the noise (rustle, rustle) that the paper pants would make when walking, kind of like corderoy does!