Friday, January 15, 2010

Makes sense to me. LOL

It Happened Like This...

The following are actual statements found on insurance forms where car drivers attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the fewest words:

Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.

The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.

I thought my windows were down but I found out it was up when I put my head through it.

I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.

A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.

A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.

I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.

In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprange up, obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car.

I had been driving for 40 years when I feel asleep at the wheel and had an accident.

I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.

As I approached the intersection, a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident. To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.

My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.

An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.

I told the police that I was not injured but on removing my hat, I found that I had a fractured skull.

I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him. The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run so I ran over him.

I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentlemen as he bounced off the hood of my car.

The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.

The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck my front end.


Arkansas Patti said...

Those are just too funny. The poor pedestrian really has no chance does he.

Lady Di Tn said...

LOL Real life is too funny when put in such words.

Anonymous said...

Almost too good to be true. All are funny. Some are funny and stupid. LOL

Beth Niquette said...

Hi, Patty! Oh, those are just hilarious! PFF means Postcard Friendship Friday.

Marie at The French Fractice is the host. You put up a cool postcard, then put your name into the Mr. McLinky and visit everyone else who has a link there--leaving comments about the postcards they put on their blogs.

I've had a lot of fun with this one, because among other things I collect vintage cards, postcards and the like.

It is great to be able to share them with people who love them as much as I do!

Have a GREAT weekend!

By the way, this is a FUNNY post--you had me laughing!

Cheryl said...

Oh goodness, what laughs!

Merle said...

Dear Patty ~~ I love your quote of the day about enjoying our health instead of worrying about it.
The jokes from car drivers on their
insurance forms are very funny.
My fave is "The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve several times before I hit him." Thanks for your comments and I am glad you enjoyed it.
Glad your weather is improving and ours is reasonable until Friday when we are back to 41C -- 105.8. Darn!!
Your riffles sound nice & yummy.
You are kind to feed the squirrels
as well as the birds. I feed heaps of birds, but we don't have squirrels here. Take care, my friend and sleep well. Love, Merle.

Twisted Fencepost said...

I hope I'm never found in a ditch by some stray cows. There's no telling what they'd do to me!!