Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Witticisms

It 's not whether you win or lose,
but how you place the blame.

You are not drunk
if you can lie on the floor
without holding on.

We have enough youth.
How about a fountain of "smart"?

The original point and click interface
was a Smith & Wesson.

A fool and his money
can throw one heck of a party.

When blondes have more fun, do they know it?

Five days a week my body is a temple.
The other two it's an amusement park.

Don't Drink and Drive
You might hit a bump and spill something.

If at first you don't succeed
skydiving is not for you.

Reality is only an illusion
that occurs due to a lack of alcohol.

Time's fun when you're having flies.
......Kermit the Frog

We are born naked, wet and hungry.
Then things get worse.

Red meat is not bad for you
Fuzzy green meat is bad for you.

Ninety-nine percent of all lawyers
give the rest a bad name.

One good thing about Alzheimer's is
you get to meet new people every day.

Alabama state motto:
At least we're not Mississippi

ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE IS NO
MATCH FOR NATURAL STUPIDITY.

The latest survey shows that
three out of four people make
up 75% of the population


10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Temple body quote I had a great laugh. And I quit reading next quotes. I am still laughing a lot.
Too good quotes.

dyanna said...

ha ha! I love the one about the Alzheimer disease. I had a blast reading these. Thank you! Have a nice day!

Arkansas Patti said...

Just delightful and such truth. By the way, that is Arkansas's state motto also.

Beth Niquette said...

Oh, this is so cute! I LOVE to laugh this early in the morning--does a body good.

Margaret Cloud said...

Very good ones, liked the first one but they all were good.

Cheryl said...

You have the best quotes, and always bring a smile!

Wanda said...

Enjoyed these Patty. I can't always get on line at the cabin...tonight it's working so I'm trying to visit a few friends.

Shionge said...

I know I need a good laugh and to chill :D

Clytie said...

Another laugh today! Love these!

Merle said...

Hello Patty ~~ Some very good quotes there. I like the first one
best and posted it recently.
Thanks for sharing them with us.

I got the letter from the Specialist
today and he said, Leave it for 6 months and have another CT scan to see if it changes so I am very glad
of that result. He said there were
no signs of immediate danger.
Take care dear friend, Love Merle.