Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Another Will and Guy

International Humour - Jewish Jokes

Firstly, let us say that we have created a joke section for many nationalities, including English (Will) and Welsh (Guy). Secondly, we hope that you will find the tone of these jokes funny rather than offensive.

1) A car hit an elderly Jewish man. The paramedic says, 'Are you comfortable?'
The man says, 'I make a good living.'

2) I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport.

3) I've been in love with the same woman for 49 years. If my wife ever finds out, she'll kill me!

4)Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won't be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did.

5) We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

6) My wife and I went back to the hotel where we spent our wedding night, only this time I stayed in the loo and cried.

7) She was at the beauty shop for two hours. That was only for the estimate. She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.

8) The Doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so the doctor gave him another six months.

9) The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, 'Mrs. Cohen, your cheque came back.
Mrs. Cohen answered, 'So did my arthritis!'

10) Doctor: You'll live to be 60.
Patient: I AM 60.
Doctor: See! What did I tell you?

2 comments:

Arkansas Patti said...

How cute. In the first grade I told my mother I wanted to be Jewish, they had more holidays.

Carole Barkett said...

I love the first one.