Thursday, March 27, 2008

New Words, Old Words - Part One...



Here are a list of new words that we could probably use in this new world...tomorrow we'll have old words with new meanings!

1. Cashtration: The act of buying (or building) a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an ass.

3 Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize that it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone: The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of having sex.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.

12. Karmageddon: It's like when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, and then the Earth explodes and it's a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon: The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

15. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic Fit: The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug: Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor: The color you turn after finding half of a worm in the fruit you're eating.


7 comments:

chelle's winks said...

These are so funny...love the Intaxication...I guess we're just lucky they do give what's ours back(?)

Mild Red (The Person Formerly Known As Ananke) said...

Hahaha, I know many ingnoranuses!!!! ;-)

Renie Burghardt said...

Funny stuff!
Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease? Hahaha.
My son says only old people get that. LOL.

Enjoyed these.

Have a good evening, Patty.

oldmanlincoln said...

This is really funny stuff. I enjoyed reading them. Some are really fantastic. Who dreams these up?

Have a nice weekend. I hope I get to feeling better soon.

Abraham Lincoln in Brookville, Ohio.

'JoAnn's-Digital-Eyes'NL said...

Hello Patty,
How are you doing?
Funny words are some of them, do you ahve 1 favorite? I like the "HIPATITIS" really cute and good for the time of the year weather.
Have a great weekend , please come for a visit at my blog with 48 Sky's (collage) from Luxemburg...
We just have been gone for a while to Luxemburg...

Greetings from JoAnn (Holland

Old Wom Tigley said...

ha! LOL... Just what I needed right now Patty.. A good giggle I look forward to more tomorrow.

Tom

Melinda said...

these are great mom!