Thursday, April 16, 2009

Surprising answers!!

Children of the Future...

This is a list of comments from test papers, essays, etc., submitted to science and health teachers by elementary, junior high, high school, and college students: It is truly astonishing what weird science our young scholars can create under the pressures of time and grades. The spellings are the original ones.

1. H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water.

2. To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube.

3. When you smell an oderless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide.

4. Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is water and gin.

5. A super saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold.

6. Liter: A nest of young puppies.

7. Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead cat.

8. Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away.

9. Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives.

10. Artificial insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull.

11. The pistol of the flower is its only protection against insects.

12. A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is.

13. To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose.

14. For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower that the heart until the heart stops.

15. For head colds: use an agonizer to spray the nose until it drops in your throat.

16. Germinate: To become a naturalized German.

17. The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

18. Blood flows down one leg and up the the other.

I can see these answers coming from young children, but high school and especially college students? Makes a person wonder doesn't it.


Brenda said...

Wow....I love hearing cute things that children come up with, but some of these were from High school students? They were just being funny I bet. These reminded me of the old TV show Art Linkletter had called "Kids Say The Darndest Things". Have a great day! And thanks for the chuckles!

Denise said...

I always leave here smiling, thanks for the good laugh Patty.

Tomate Farcie said...

"Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is water and gin." Makes sense, lol! ;)

I won't even comment on "when the farmer does it to the cow."


Tan said...

That was hillarious, yet scary!! Pray for us!! Pray for the World!!

I'm still enjoying my vacation. Spent sometime in writing this story. want you to read it and tell me how it is. Hope you like it.

Mistake: A Scary reason @ Thus Wrote Tan!

Margaret Cloud said...

I was already laughing with just the first one, great post, I am with you the younger kids but high school and college, no way. Put a smile on my face, take care.

The Mulligan Family said...

As you said, very cute coming from grade schoolers... BUT High School Students????? Very very scary!

Funny list though. I got a chuckle out of more than a couple of them.

Cheers, Cindy

Priyanka Khot said...

That was funny... but if students are actually giving such answers, i am scared to think what will happen in future.

Merle said...

Dear Patty ~~ These were really funny The Hot and Cold water and the odourless gas. Lots of good ones here and in your other posts. Sorry I have been absent of late, but feeling much better at last Glad you liked the pic of Peter and myself. He is safely home in Queensland now. We have become quite close the last few years, It was great having Peter here, as well as my granddaughters.

I am glad you read a couple of jokes to Abe and he got a chuckle
as well. Take great care dear friend. Love, Merle.

Winifred said...

They come up with some corkers don't they. Thanks for these.