Sunday, October 18, 2009

Bless the children

The Lord's Payer...

When my twin daughters were young, I taught them to say this prayer before going to bed. As I listened outside their door, I could hear them say, "Give us this steak and daily bread, and forgive us our mattresses." My husband and I always had a good laugh over this. That was over 50 years ago, and the memory still remains in my heart.

Groton, Mass.
My mother spent her early childhood saying, "Hail Mary, full of grapes."

Missoula, Mont.
My son, who is in nursery school, said, "Our Father, who art in Heaven, how didja know my name?"

Uniontown, Ohio
I remember thinking this prayer was "Give us this day our jelly bread."

Covina, Calif.
I recall reading something years ago about the Pledge of Allegiance. Some child thought it began, "I led the pigeons to the flag."

Cleveland, Ohio
When I was little, I often wondered who Richard Stands was. You know: "I pledge allegiance to the flag . . . And to the republic for Richard Stands."

Tampa, Fla.
When my husband was 6 years old, he thought a certain Prayer was "He suffered under a bunch of violets." The real words were "under Pontius Pilate," but at that age, he didn't know better. To this day, we still snicker in church whenever that prayer is read.

Oak Harbor, Wash.
When my older brother was very young, he always walked up to the church altar with my mother when she took communion. On one occasion, he tugged at her arm and asked, "What does the priest say when he gives you the bread?" Mom whispered something in his ear. Imagine his shock many years later when he learned that the priest doesn't say, "Be quiet until you get to your seat."

Grand Junction, Colo.
When I was younger, I believed the line was "Lead a snot into temptation." I thought I was praying for my little sister to get into trouble.


Nanna Murakami said...

Hello Dear Patty,
Just Love your postings...
My Grandson who is just 7, isn't old enough for Communion. He will receive his FirstCommunion this coming Spring. He goes up with his oldr sister to get a Blessing now, and stage whispered the the first time he observed her getting Communion, " How come I didn't get any Crackers...Does it Taste Good...?" The parishoners were roaring with laughter...

Anonymous said...

These are so funny. I can't believe it.

Twisted Fencepost said...

Funny how we replace words we don't know with words we do know.

Brenda said...

Those are hilarious Patty. My husband teaches Children's liturgy and I don't think he has ever heard these. I will have to show these to him. Kind of reminded me the Art Linkletter show...Kids Say the Darndest Things.

The Mulligan Family said...

Oh, those are too cute. Out of the mouths of babes!

The Mulligan Family said...

Oh, wanted to say thanks for all of your concern and kind thoughts about Richard. He's doing much better. The recovery has been very slow going - much slower than either of us had anticipated. He still has good days and bad days - but the bad days aren't as "bad" as they were. He should be back to normal in a few weeks - hopefully!


Margaret Cloud said...

I enjoyed reading this, it was funny, thanks for coming by, hope you are having a nice Sunday.

Renie Burghardt said...

Kids do say the darndest things, don't they? These were all cute and brought a chuckle.

Hope your Sunday was nice. We had bright sunshine and 62 today, and I got home late. But I had a great day today.

Have a good night, Patty.

Merle said...

Dear Patty ~~ I love the Plane repair one, and all the odd words in the prayers. Just a quick note to
tell you that I have left an award for you on my blog. Hope you enjoy.
Sleep well. my friend. Love, Merle.