Tuesday, January 05, 2010

Window shopping

New Husbands
A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs

She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'

So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3
- These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.

'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.

'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5
- These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

PLEASE NOTE:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.

The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.


17 comments:

Helen said...

Cute joke. Helen

Margaret Cloud said...

I would of chosen floor #i, I am too old for the rest of the floors, ha, ha.

Patty said...

Margaret you are too funny, but I feel the same way. LOL

Reanaclaire said...

LOL.... my gosh.. are we ladies that greedy??? i think i will stop at the 3rd floor if i m given a chance again.. hahaha...

Arkansas Patti said...

Three would suit me fine. Any better and every woman would try to steal him.
We are at 9 degrees Patty. Make you feel better?

Beth Niquette said...

(guffaw) Ahaahahaaaa...oh, that is just TOO funny. Talk about your male/female differences!!!

Sunny said...

LOL, I thought there were no men on the 6th floor because there are no perfect men!! Just kidding!

Cathy said...

Hello Patty
You know it really is true that theres no pleasing some people lol
Take care
Cathy

Renie Burghardt said...

Ha! Funny! Men are not as choosy as women. They usually have only one thing on their minds. Haha.

Keep warm!

Renie

Sunny said...

Cute, funny story :)

I agree with Margaret !

Cheryl said...

Great one!I don't know far I would get with my bad knees, hopefully there is an elevator :)

Charles said...

Really Neat!

Reader Wil said...

I join you and Margaret! Actually I was looking for a faithful husband. My late husband was and I got used to it!
Thank you Patty for the visit to my `Yesterday` So you had a lot of
operations when you were young. Well memories can be bitter sweet.

Anonymous said...

Hi patty, I came here through Claire's blog. Glad I came... your joke inspired a smile on my lips! :-D

Twisted Fencepost said...

I agree with Arkansas Patty!!

The Mulligan Family said...

Oh Good Lord! That was hilarious!

sandy said...

hahahaha, this was funny!