Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Will and Guy's Joke


Motor Insurance Quotes from Claim Forms
If we are unlucky enough to be involved in a car accident, of course it is never our fault. The following quotes show what people write on their insurance claim forms. Apparently these are strange but true stories.

1. "I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.".

2. I knocked over a man. He admitted it was his fault as he had been run over before.

3. I collided with a stationary tramcar coming the other way.

4. I consider that neither vehicle was to blame but if either
were to blame it was the other one (Irish).

5. I left my Austin Seven outside and when I came out later to my amazement there was an Austin Twelve.

6. Car had to turn sharper than was necessary owing to an invisible lorry.

7. To avoid a collision I ran into the other car.

8. "The pedestrian had no idea which way to run, so I ran over him.".

9. The other car collided with mine without giving any warning of its intention.

10. The other man altered his mind so I had to run into him.

11. I told the other idiot what he was and went on.

12. A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

13. I unfortunately ran over a pedestrian and the old gentleman was taken to hospital, much regretting the circumstances.

14. I thought the side window was down but it was up, as I found when I put my head through it.

15. If the other driver had stopped a few yards behind himself the accident would not have happened.

16. She suddenly saw me, lost her head and we met.

17. Cow wandered into my car. I was afterwards informed that the cow was half-witted.

18. Three women were talking to each other and when two stepped back and one stepped forward I had to have an accident.

19. There were plenty of lookers-on but no witnesses.

20. A bull was standing near and a fly must have tickled him because he gored my car.

6 comments:

Arkansas Patti said...

Number 8 cracked me up. Reminds me of the unfortunate squirrels I ocasionally flatten.

Gramma Ann said...

#17... My granddaughter had just gone through a green light recently and a cow was along the side of the road and she hit it. She didn't even see it, and didn't know what she had hit, until she got out and looked. And this all took place in a residential area, not out in the country. Fortunately the cow hung around until the police arrived. They tracked down the owner.

Lady Di Tn said...

Sometime real is funnier than made up. LOL Peace

Renie Burghardt said...

I agree with Lady Di! And number 11 cracked me up! Gramma Ann's is kinda funny, too. LOL.

Have a good night, Patty.

Cheryl said...

Oh my goodness Patty, loved this!

Margaret Cloud said...

These ar real good, we just had a accident, my husband backed into a car.